Self-esteem or self-responsibility

A couple had a philosophy of raising their only child with great self-esteem. Hence, they will always appreciate, admire, and affirm their son. They will not allow anyone to discipline or instruct their son. Worse, if a teacher in the school disciplines or punishes their son, they will file a complaint with the school management. Without maturity to accept correction and discipline the boy became a wicked drug addict and died by suicide.

Form or perform? Children are a gift from God to parents. Good stewardship is to bring up the child in the fear of the Lord. Parents are primarily responsible for the formation of good godly character, values, and righteous principles. Some parents treat children as performers instead.

Affirm or reform? Children need affirmation as well as reformation. When they are doing what is right and good, they should be affirmed and encouraged. At the same time, when they do something wrong, they should be corrected, warned, instructed, and in necessary disciplined.

Rod of discipline: The Bible teaches the parents to use the rod of discipline to remove foolishness or ignorance from a child and provide the right direction. (Proverbs 23:13,14) The rod of discipline should be used discreetly, minimally, wisely, prayerfully, and in private. Spare the rod and spoil a child. (Proverbs 13:24)

Self-responsibility: A child is a moral being created in the image of God. Children have spiritual and moral responsibility. Parents should teach children to be self-disciplined, and self-responsible. Otherwise, children will blame others, the environment, lack of support from others for their failures. When self-esteem is over-emphasized, self-responsibility is ignored.

Self-esteem: True self-esteem begins with the fear of God, as it gives knowledge, wisdom, and understanding. (Proverbs 9:10) Fear of God also helps children to depart from evil. (Proverbs 16:6) Helping children to understand that God had created them, loves them, and leads them builds self-esteem.

Transform: All including children should ultimately be transformed to be like Lord Jesus Christ. All efforts to build self-esteem, self-responsibility, and discipline should lead children in this direction.

Am I building self-esteem and self-discipline based on biblical principles?